|.LiFe fUll oF cRaP.|

2008-02-25T07:15:00.000-08:00

it's been quite a while. so how do i do this.

updates:

after a couple of weeks is my birthday already...desperately hoping that a good samaritan would give me a psp slim for a present..heck! dream on..i even asked my mom already if she would be kind enough to buy me a psp and just let me pay her for about 6 months or more (installment of course), but i know she wouldn't agree with me..i know her. it really sucks..life sucks big time! i'll be earning my 11k (they said) probably 2nd payout of march...big amount yet it will all end up to my credit card payment...shitty right? oh well, as much as i want to just get all the money and buy a psp..i know i just can't. i have to learn how to control myself- determine my needs from my wants, naxx ganun ba yun? hehehe! it all takes discipline. i know i have to prioritize some things, and it won't take me forever to hold on to this job. sooner or later i would have to let go of this job. di ko din naman yata gugustuhin na mabaon ako sa utang..haii...so tough and complicated. anyway, i'll be on leave on my birthday. yup, nagsabe nko sa office. i just need to fix some stuff like my 1 year expired driver's license..take a rest.. aun..kapalit naman they gave me really tough task sa office..pressure tlga nasa akin.. my gosh sa akin nakasalalay magiging success ng event and recruitment of course..lahat ng tricks na pwede kong gawin, gagawin ko tlga...kung pde lang magmagic ng mga applicants ginawa ko na...haiii...please pray for me...wish me luck...owel..churvs nasan ka man biyayaan mko ng sourcing powers mu..haii...

..to be continued..

il be back for more..

til then. ciao!

2007-12-30T00:58:00.000-08:00

you can't really have it all.

good bye 2007, welcome 2008.

sad part of every new year's eve? sleepless emotional nights.

ain't tears of joy, but of depression.. sadness..envy..jealousy..

sinful.

2007-11-25T02:27:00.000-08:00

Nov. 18, 2007

meeting place: mcdo, katipunan 8am

halos andun na ang lahat nung kame ay dumating. except for kristine and raki. si hannah? don't ask, isa siyang drawing. we left katips around 9:30am.

1st stop. leslie's tagaytay for lunch

i had soo much fun! goy's were there except for hannah (talaga naman) who got drunk the night before, ends up being scolded by her mom...tsktsk, sayang dude dame pa naman sana natin pagchchikahan! noni was there also wd me kaya sobrang nging enjoyable din gimik wd friends.=)

nweiz, masarap ang bulalo at tawilis. though ang laki ng nagastos ok lang minsan lang naman eh.

pero eto guys tip lang, if you plan on going to tagaytay wag kayo tumuloy sa leslie's! hahaha! siraan daw ba... well not really. the place is not cozy. food masarap pero comparable wd cheaper restos. feeling ko lang di sulit magbayad ng mahal dun- the hell i care with the view of taal lake?

enough of this shit. hahah! try Bed Boutique.. it's awesome there!

next stop: enchanted kingdom

flying fiesta
rialto
space shuttle
anchor's away
wheel of fate
jungle log jam
bumpcar
carousel
rio grande rapids

and oh...

the swan lake.. heheh... kme 2 lang ni noni..=)

oh well, sweet tlga xa (u know who am i talking about), would u imagine sumakay kami sa space shuttle tipong nagffreak out na tlga ko xe maluwag ung seatbelt ko. the whole time she was holding my hand as well as my seatbelt...aww... super maalaga tlga.. ayun after sa space shuttle sabe nya masaket daw yung kamay nya... wawa naman baby ku.

here are some snapshots of our mushy moments:

til next time! ciao!

2007-11-03T09:30:00.000-07:00

sometimes it's really hard to determine what your priorities are...
there's a certain point when you don't know what things should you prioritize first...

apparently, di naman talaga lahat ng bagay pwede pagsabayin.

and that's what we call goals..

do you guys agree with me that goals and priorities are almost the same?

or pang "laurene" lang na pag-iisip toh?

hehehe.

oh well...

better continue this some other time..

2007-09-21T10:23:00.000-07:00

DRAMA QUEEN- I'M NOT.

too much drama makes me sick!

hehehe...true.

oh well.. .we're okay now.

sana nga i hope.

2007-09-09T04:02:00.000-07:00

life suxx...

big time..

napakabilis ng mga pangyayare..

all the while masaya kame, the next thing i know wala na.

sayang sobra...

anung nangyare dba.. haii.. sometimes may mga bagay na di ko kaya iexplain...this time i dunno na.. yet, im still hoping...

i love you still...and i hope your happy with what happened to us.

no more burden. enough of hurting.

2007-09-02T03:12:00.000-07:00

here i go back again in my old foolish ways.

and..

i don't wanna commit the same mistakes again...regretting thing i shouldn't have done in the first place.

i'm happy now- ayokong manaket. ayoko manloko. i don't wanna tell lies.

hahah! anu ba toh! seryosong usapan itoh..

nature ba tlga ng lahat ng mga tibo na maging super friendly and thoughtful??

or sobrang bilis lang tlaga nila? kaloka.

hey, if ur thinking na may 3rd party ako.. wala noh.. loyal parin ako kay bebe..

and the person that could probably change my mind hasn't been born yet.

kidding!

well...

here's the thing..

someone's attracted to.. guess who? me! cnu pa nga ba! lol!

ngwwork xa same company as mine.

actually, ako nginterview sa knya.

ok nman xa.. exagg lang ang accent pag nagsalita..

but in overall she's fine.

unfortunately, she found me in dl.

aun.. to make the story short.. naguusap na kme..ym, dl im.. at kung anu pa..

haii.. un todo karir ang lola mo...ayoko na nga mkausap eh.. halos di ko na rn nirereplyan mga text nya.. haii.. tlga..

. . .

hey guys.. i wanna go to puerto galera...

who wants to come wit me? ahaha! matinding brainstorming toh.. at of course...

pagbubudget!

lake house. a lot like love.

2007-08-27T07:50:00.000-07:00

movie review?

nah.

just recently i was able to watch the above mentioned movies. nice pala.. i never had the chance to watch it before, aun obviously sobrang naappreciate ko sila ngayon. hehehe.. parang fairytale, sometimes u get to love the person the least that ur expecting.. well, at least happy ending.. ako kaya kelan magiging ganun? sad noh.. always unfair.. parang ang dating pinipilit ko lang mangyare lahat ng bagay...

huhuhu.. ayaw ko ng ganun! ang sad!!!!

haii...

inggit nman ako sa kada ko.. sa mga nagroadtrip jan ngayon to batangas...

hayy... be safe nlang...

and i miss you guys...

sabe pala ni noni (well, pumayag na siya) sama daw kme minsan overnight tyo...

san nman kya? kayo na bahala...

2007-08-19T20:33:00.000-07:00

it's a looonggg weekend!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

yet...

tomorrow....

we're all going back to work!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

whether we like it or not...that's how life goes...

damn i soo miss my college life when i just used to cut classes...

-out with friends
-unplanned gimmicks
-'tambay' @starbucks
-katipunan days: sbc, mcdo, chiggys, ken afford, wok dis way, redbox, gayuma...aww!
-up isawan
-stroll days @galleria & tien

most of all...

i miss my friends so muchhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!

2007-07-15T09:05:00.000-07:00

harry potter and the order of the phoenix

well...it wasn't really that nice...kinda confusing, esp. if you weren't able to read the book.

sad part of the story: godfather sirius died, i pity harry...he lost another loved one.

things in HP are getting complicated and exciting at the same time, as the story moves to another level..or should i say chapter.

can't wait for the next movie..HP and the half-blood prince. my friend already finished reading the book and told me that dumbledore's gonna die..verdict: snape...hogwarts closed down...uhmm.. scary huh..?

2007-07-08T05:46:00.000-07:00

I LOVE TRANSFORMERS! nice movie...heheh! we watched this movie last saturday and i got a sticker for free! hehehe! kewlness...well, in general okay naman pla xa, di kse ako fanatic ng mga robots kind of movie before. kala ko nga boring eh, di naman pala. aun.. officemates ko kse are so into transformers, before nagtataka pa ko anu ba yung transformers..hehe..coz when i was a kid i used to watch power rangers, ultraman, shaider, and sailormoon.. pero transformers di ko tlga xa know. sobrang worth it xa panoorin. eto na fave kong movie!

TO THE COWARD ANONYMOUS LOSER:

2007-07-08T00:11:00.000-07:00

thanks for the comment.

i do respect your opinion.

okay so here's what i think:

reason's why a person badmouths other people:

1. this "anonymous" person is jealous.
2. envy.
3. was rejected several times.
4. unfinished business with an ex-
5. most painful part of life: NOBODY LOVES YOU.

so get a life! definitely, YOU ARE THE LOSER.

you have the nerves of posting a comment on my blog with an anonymous identity and just call her a loser...such a coward. Why don’t you just tell it straight to her face?

if you don't have respect for yourself, BACK OFF and better learn to respect my personal life and the people who loves me.

rock u!

2007-06-14T08:41:00.001-07:00

2007-06-10T04:37:00.000-07:00

you turned my whole world upside down...

that's definitely the best song that would describe our relationship.

masaya. malungkot. magulo. nakakakilig. mahirap.

i almost gave up everything because of her- kase mahal ko xa.

un naman un diba?

but what people don't know is that for 2 and a half years madameng beses na rin kame nagbreak.. sad noh? that's the truth. still, we managed to save our relationship- no matter how it hurts, kahit sobrang pride na ang nakataya...para samin 2, there's always room for forgiveness. kahit ganu kasakit yung nangyare, mas nangingibabaw pa rin yung love..i can't really elaborate on that- basta nafifeel ko na lang at nangyayare na lang. i admit that we're not a perfect couple. actually, we have a problem right now- isang issue na di ko iniexpect na magiging problem namin dalawa.. :( it's so sad u know... i entrusted her to take care of my stuffs (i won't disclose it), but i was wrong and sobrang nireregret ko na to the extent na parang na truma na ko mag-entrust sa kanya...all of a sudden she confessed to me na she did something to my stuffs for the sake of pleasing me... da hell was that diba??? i cried to her.. as in sobrang hagulgol ako at nagalet sa kanya.. i told her na as much as possible, sa relationship namin ayokong magkaron ng financial issues...alam niya yun...para sakin naman kasi pera lang yan- di dapat pinag-aawayan at dapat bigayan. usually set-up namin kung sino yung wala (financially) magsspend muna yung meron. don't give noni a bad impression, kasi kahit ako may trabaho minsan walang-wala rin ako. ayun..so far, naayos na namin yung samin 2, di naman nag endup na kailangan namin maghiwalay...di ko ginawa yun... mahal ko xa sobra.. however, i made a deal with her and she definitely has no choice but to agree. aun..somehow mejo parang nag-iba tingin ko sa kanya...haii.. ang sad tlga!!! kainis!!! parang may lamat na tuloy yung trust ko sa kanya... haiii bebe... bakit mo kasi ginawa yun..? : (

damn, i miss you my friends...

knet, glai, april, twinsis: nix and tiff...lahat ng ka-bjounans...

goys: tin, hannah, camille, avy...

haiii... sobrang nasasad ako... i soo miss u guys.. i just wanna cry... ; (

i hope you guys are not mad at me.. sobrang walang wala na ko sa mundo niyo..kung alam niyo sobrang i wanted to see you all..

i hope you all understand my situation...

don't worry soon i'll have my fone back...i'll get in touch with you more often...

well, that's it for now.

mwahh!

cRuShie mowd

2007-05-16T00:26:00.000-07:00

remember my crushie??? yung taga miriam din??? hahah! she viewed m y site sa multiply!!!

oh my gawd!!!! grabe kinikilig ako... hehehe..

aun wala lang..

sana i-add nya ko...wishhhhhh!!!!

2007-05-08T23:25:00.000-07:00

you've got to read this...

> When You Divorce Me, Carry Me Out in Your Arms

>>> On my wedding day, I carried my wife in my arms. The> bridal car stopped > in> front of our one-room flat. My buddies insisted that> I carry her out of> the> car in my arms. So I carried her into our home.>>> She was then plump and shy. I was a strong and happy > bridegroom.>> This was the scene of ten years ago.>> The following days were as simple as a cup of pure> water: we had a kid,> I> went into business and tried to make more money. >>> When the assets were steadily increasing, the> affections between us> seemed> to ebb. She was a civil servant. Every morning we> left home together and> got home almost at the same time. Our kid was > studying in a boarding> school.>> Our marriage life seemed to be enviably happy. But> the calm life was> more> likely to be affected by unpredictable changes.>> Dew came into my life.>> It was a sunny day. I stood on a spacious balcony.> Dew hugged me from> behind. My heart once again was immersed in her> stream of love. This> was the apartment I bought for her. >> Dew said, You are the kind of man who best draws> girls eyeballs. Her> words> suddenly reminded me of my wife. When we just> married, my wife said, Men> like you, once successful, will be very attractive > to girls. Thinking of> this, I became somewhat hesitant. I knew I had> betrayed my wife. But I> couldn t help doing so.>> I moved Dew s hands aside and said, You go to select> some furniture,> O.K.?> I've got something to do in the company.Obviously> she was unhappy,> because> I had promised her to go and see with her. At the> moment, the idea of > divorce became clearer in my mind although it used> to be something> impossible to me.>> However, I found it rather difficult to tell my wife> about it. No matter> how mildly I mentioned it to her, she would be > deeply hurt. Honestly,> she> was a good wife. Every evening she was busy> preparing dinner. I was> sitting> in front of the TV. The dinner was ready soon.Then> we watched TV > together.> Or, I was lounging before the computer, visualizing> Dew s body. This was> the means of my entertainment.>> One day I said to her in a slight joking way,> suppose we divorce, what > will> you do? She stared at me for a few seconds without a> word. Apparently> she> believed that divorce was something too far away> from her. I couldn t> imagine how she would react once she got to know I > was serious.>> When my wife went to my office, Dew had just stepped> out. Almost all the> staff looked at my wife with a sympathetic eye and> tried to hide> something> while talking with her. She seemed to have got some> hint. She gently> smiled> at my subordinates. But I read some hurt in her> eyes.>> Once again, Dew said to me, He Ning, divorce her, > O.K.? Then we live> together. I nodded. I knew I could not hesitate> anymore.>> When my wife served the last dish, I held her hand.> Ive got something> to tell you, I said. >> She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the> hurt in her eyes.> Suddenly I didn t know how to open my mouth. But I> had to let her know> what> I was thinking. I want to divorce. I raised a > serious topic calmly.>> She didn t seem to be much annoyed by my words,> instead she asked me> softly, why? . I m serious. I avoided her question.> This so-called> answer > turned her angry. She threw away the chopsticks and> shouted at me, you> are> not a man! .>> At that night, we didn t talk to each other. She was> weeping. I knew she> wanted to find out what had happened to our> marriage. But I could hardly> give her a satisfactory answer, because my heart had> gone to Dew.>> With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce > agreement which stated> that> she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of> my company. She> glanced> at it and then tore it into pieces. I felt a pain in> my heart. The woman > who had been living ten years with me would become a> stranger one day.> But> I could not take back what I had said.>> Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was> what I had expected > to> see. To me her cry was actually a kind of> release.The idea of divorce> which> had obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be> firmer and clearer.>> A late night, I came back home after entertaining my > clients. I saw her> writing something at the table. I fell asleep fast.>>> When I woke up, I found she was still there. I> turned over and was> asleep> again.> She brought up her divorce conditions: she didn t > want anything from> me,but> I was supposed to give her one month s time before> divorce, and in the> month s time we must live as normal life as> possible. Her reason was> simple: our son would finish his summer vacation a > month later and she> didn> t want him to see our marriage was broken.>> She passed me the agreement she drafted, and then> asked me, He Ning, do> you still remember how I entered our bridal room on > the wedding day?> This> question suddenly brought back all those wonderful> memories to me. I> nodded> and said, I remember . You carried me in your arms,> she continued, so, I > have a requirement, that is, you carry me out in> your arms on the day> when> we divorce. From now to the end of this month, you> must carry me out> from> the bedroom to the door every morning. >> I accepted with a smile. I knew she missed those> sweet days and wished> to end her marriage with a romantic form.>> I told Dew about my wife s divorce conditions. She> laughed loudly and > thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she> does, she has to face> the> result of divorce, she said scornfully. Her words> more or less made me> feel> uncomfortable. >> My wife and I hadn t had any body contact since my> divorce intention was> explicitly expressed. We even treated each other as> a stranger. So when> I carried her out for the first day, we both > appeared clumsy. Our son> clapped behind us, daddy is holding mummy in his> arms. His words brought> me> a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting> room, then to the door, > I> walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She> closed her eyes and said> softly, Let us start from today, dont tell our son.> I nodded, feeling> somewhat upset. I put her down outside the door. She > went to wait for> bus,> I drove to office.>> On the second day, both of us acted much more> easily.She leaned on my> chest. We were so close that I could smell the> fragrance of her blouse. > I> realized that I hadn t looked at this intimate woman> carefully for a> long> time. I found she was not young any more. There were> some fine wrinkles> on> her face. >> On the third day, she whispered to me, The outside> garden is being> demolished. Be careful when you pass there.>> On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I seemed to> feel that we were > still an intimate couple and I was holding my> sweetheart in my arms. The> visualization of Dew became vaguer.>> On the fifth and sixth day, she kept reminding me> something, such as, > where she put the ironed shirts, I should be careful> while cooking,> etc.I> nodded. The sense of intimacy was even stronger.>> I didn t tell Dew about this.>> I felt it was easier to carry her. Perhaps the > everyday workout made me> stronger. I said to her, It seems not difficult to> carry you now.>> She was picking her dresses. I was waiting to carry> her out. She tried> quite a few but could not find a suitable one. Then > she sighed, All my> dresses have grown fatter. I smiled. But I suddenly> realized that it was> because she was thinner that I could carry her more> easily, not because> I> was stronger. I knew she had buried all the > bitterness in her heart.> Again,> I felt a sense of pain. Subconsciously I reached out> a hand to touch her> head.>> Our son came in at the moment. Dad, it's time to> carry mum out. He said.> To> him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had> been an essential> part> of his life. She gestured our son to come closer and> hugged him tightly. > I> turned my face because I was afraid I would change> my mind at the last> minute. I held her in my arms, walking from the> bedroom, through the> sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my > neck softly and> naturally. I held her body tightly,> as if we came back to our wedding day. But her much> lighter weight made> me> sad.>> On the last day, when I held her in my arms I could > hardly move a step.> Our> son had gone to school. She said, Actually I hope> you will hold me in> your> arms until we are old.>> I held her tightly and said, Both you and I didn t > notice that our life> was> lack of such intimacy.>> I jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the> door. I was afraid> any> delay would make me change my decision. I walked > upstairs. Dew opened> the> door. I said to her, Sorry, Dew, I won t divorce. I> m serious.>> She looked at me, astonished. The she touched my> forehead. You got no> fever. She said. I moved her hand off my head. > Sorry, Dew, I said, I can> only say sorry to you, I won t divorce. My marriage> life was boring> probably because she and I didn t value the details> of life, not because> we> didn t love each other any more. Now I understand> that since I carried> her> into the home, she gave birth to our> child, I am supposed to hold her until I am old. So> I have to say sorry > to> you.>> Dew seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud> slap and then slammed> the door and burst into cry. I walked downstairs and> drove to the> office.>> When I passed the floral shop on the way, I ordered> a bouquet for my> wife> which was her favorite. The salesgirl asked me to> write the greeting> words> on the card. I smiled and wrote, I ll carry you out > every morning until> we> are old.

2007-04-25T17:13:00.000-07:00

Annica,

si noni un noh! hahah! last year pa yang pic na yan kaya mukha kameng mapayat pa jan! musta ka na?? my blogger ka?? naghahanap pa ko ng backup fone...gagamitin ko parin ung no. na un. text ko kayo asap pag meron na. miss ko na kayo!

2007-04-16T01:05:00.000-07:00

i made a big difference in her life and i'm so damn proud of it!

hmmm... what do u think are the attributes that contributed to this difference i'm talking about..?

harhar! feelers! lake ba ulo?

ehhh...wala lang parang pag iniisip ko sobrang tagal na namin it's been like 2 years and 5 months already. ang tagal na pla namin mahal ko pa rin siya! hekhek! uhm.. bakit kaya? hahah! what a stupid question?? bangag nanaman ako! miss ko lang cia that's why...haii..just need to take a load off my work.. but really, miss ko na cia even if we just saw each other last saturday! ahaha! i feel like im soo attached to her na.. haii..

miss you daddy!!!

2007-04-15T18:37:00.000-07:00

start your day right!

uhmm.. so how should i begin?

here i am in front of my computer without any idea where should i begin my work...unfortunately, i came late to office today. o dabuh? monday pa man din! lech! haii.. i can hardly wait for payday friday dame ko bills! arrggh! credit card pa! stupid me!

plus...im hungry!

haii..

ako'y tuliro..

give me a break!!!

2007-04-09T18:56:00.000-07:00

sanfo treats- the best!

apple coated with caramel...yummy...hehehe!

i got the chance to hang out with my good friend april last sunday. we went shopping at rob galleria...it was quite some time before we got to see each other again. shuxx...! she was sooo skinny! anung nangyare bij??? at xmpre wala naman nagbago baliw pa rin sha! hahah! joke! tnx bij...heheh.. she accompanied me sa pagshoshopping!

2007-04-03T01:53:00.000-07:00

everyt hing's fine now... and i hope tuloy-tuloy na nga...

don't wory about me guys..usual away bati and breakup thing...

i miss u guys sobra...

2007-03-29T01:15:00.001-07:00

sobrang babaw mo. all this time tingin mo sakin ganun, alam ko naman un eh. never kita binalewala...u really don't know me well, do you? i care for you that much..pero di mo nakikita un xe nakikita mo lahat ng kapalpakan ko at kalokohan ko. i dunno what i'm feeling right now. nakakamanhid pala pag parating ganito ang nangyayare. i didn't cry last night neither feel any regret. i've been using my new no. now but still keeps on hoping that you might text me in my old no. -labo noh? i keep on checking my old sim kung meron bang nagtext. pero wala. i guess u can manage life without me. maraming beses ako natempt na itext ka pero surprisingly napipigilan ko sarili ko lalo na emotions ko. haiii...what's gonna happen in the next few days...babalik pa kaya ung dati? i really don't know. asa kin ba ung prob..syo..or sa tin 2? owel...one thing's for sure and i guess lahat ng close sakin knows kung anu talaga nafefeel ko syo... mahal pa rin kita.. minahal kita ng sobra...haii ang hirap!!! pwede ba yun...pwede bang mabago agad kung anung nafefeel ko tlga..

2007-03-28T02:11:00.000-07:00

finally i'm on blogger! hahah!

i'll update you guys soon...i'm still working on my page..

...see yah around!!!

mwaaahh!

|.LiFe fUll oF cRaP.|

lake house. a lot like love.

TO THE COWARD ANONYMOUS LOSER:

rock u!

*cRuShie mowd*

cRuShie mowd